This night is a lazy night. As I am scrolling in my news feed I found my old good friend and her photos. It was fun looking around, but at the end I should have not let myself drag me to her wall.
My life is a simple-humble-happy-faithful-life; I have live like that for years. Sometimes I get carried away but still managed to bring back my true identity, one memory in life I could not forget that never challenged my personality is the moment when I met the best-best-BEST Friend in the whole wide world. She was my classmate way back seven years; she was one of the best people in my life during those times. I wouldn’t forget everything we have been through. She’s the reason why I, first time in my life, had the confidence to express what I really feel, who I really am, what I really want to do, and why I want to do it even beyond my reasons. And I love her.
If you’re thinking I’m a bisexual, no-no hehehe! (No offense to bisexual people) and I’m not asexual as well just so you know. hehe~ I love her because we’re best friends and no one understands us better than us. We understand each other. We think alike (well not all the time). We share. We sat in silence. We know when to say a word or not. We have the kind of relationship anyone would consider perfect, but events suddenly got blurry in my eyes, and I know people don’t hold fate.
She moved to a far away place.
However, the fairy tale of two best friends went on. We wrote letters to each other and send messages through phone, but it was not long until our lives abruptly proceeded in different aspects. When she left, I cried and cried, until I ran out of breath, she cried too, but we couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t face the mirror, I couldn’t imagine her so far, and I couldn’t accept the truth. I hold on to her letter that night of December. I wished and hoped and longed for us to be together. She was more than just a best friend, she was much like a sister, even though she had never gone to my home because her Grandmother won’t let her to, we would spend our time inside the school and walk home together and talk and laugh. I couldn’t smile at school since the day she left. I know her life crumpled a bit, but she’s a positive thinker, she’s strong. I remember her letter to me saying,
Wag ka iiyak, kapag umiyak ka mararamdaman ko yun at maiiyak din ako, kaya wag ka na iiyak :)
I moved on. Stand on my own. Looked forward and began focusing on the reality of my life that I am desperate to something that will never happen. We lost contact when I ‘moved on’… but I treasured her so dearly. I still remember the day we became seatmates and how we overlooked on how we became friends. She’s a treasure in my life I wouldn’t forget. Four years after, we found contact again on Facebook, I hope to regain the years we lost together but much has changed that our conversation is not like before. It was more like, ‘How’s your Christmas?’, ‘How is that guy from our FL class?’, in fact, emoticons filled the spaces and holes to make the conversation not look like thin, pale,..
Two years after, dead air. Nothing. Almost nothing because we/I still see each other/her on Facebook and not even talk. What we had before is now just a story ready to be told in private chitchat. It was one memorable event in my life I would not easily forget. :)
But reality is painful and life is all about that. If you would not learn how to accept these things with faith in God, you would always end up broken, frustrated, dull, and weak. Several episodes in my life have I been through denial stage, but I found a way to acceptance. Courage. You know when you can and you can when you believe. Trust in your self, never lose faith. Hold on to what is keeping you strong, but do not forget how you came to be. Do not forget the people who helped you get through as well as to people behind this success. Remember, in every question, there is a corresponding answer, and to every test there is a corresponding score. Be sure that you
aim shoot the highest positive score and learn from wrong answers you chose.
This is me ending my blog today. Have a nice sleep ya’ll! Good night! Its 3 o’clock in the morning, I have to eat breakfast later. Moms gonna get mad o____o bbye! Thanks for reading my post todaaay!!